all grades are in.

Got the Torts grade last night, so all grades are in. It was my lowest grade -- above the curve, but nevertheless kind of rattled me.

I'm trying not to be too critical of my performance because I really felt I gave it my best effort. That effort was kind of a shot in the dark, not only because it was my first semester of law school but also because I've never truly committed myself to doing well in an academic environment. Studying hard definitely did not come naturally, so that was a major success in itself. I feel like I really learned the difference between studying hard and studying smart. I'm proud that I knew the material inside and out, but I knew all along that a command of the material wasn't enough: exam preparation and exam-taking skills are the critical factor in being successful in law school. Although I believe those who have some positive experience and momentum in exam preparation have a better chance at doing very well right off the bat, there are definitely things I could have done more effectively to put myself in better scoring position, so to speak.

It's very different, refreshing, and ultimately agonizing to expect so much of myself. I came to law school with so much purpose and motivation, and have big advantages of not having to work this year while taking on the lighter load of night school. I feel like this leaves little excuse for not finishing at or very near the top. When class rankings come out in a couple of weeks, I think I'll be near the top, but not "very near." The good news is I probably won't have a lot of ground to make up.